


Intergalactic Anthropology

by Anonymous



Category: Huniepop & Huniecam (Video Games)
Genre: F/F, Half-Nymphojinn Tiffany Maye, Jessie is a Nymphojinn AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-14
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:40:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28066389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: For some, White Girl Wednesday means a night on the town with friends. For Audrey Belrose, it means being the only human buffer between a group of extraterrestrial beings.Or, Audrey finds out her best friend-slash-maybe crush is part murderous alien sex demon and gets a lot more than she bargained for.
Relationships: Audrey Belrose/Tiffany Maye
Comments: 5
Kudos: 10
Collections: Anonymous





	1. Chapter 1

Audrey took out the spare key entrusted to her and unlocked the door. She stepped into Tiffany's apartment quietly, not wanting to disturb her friend. It was very early in the morning, probably past 2 AM, after all. Since she only dropped by to pick up a sweater she’d left there the day prior, Audrey figured she could go in and out quickly.

As expected, the living room was dark and empty. Using only the pale moonlight that shone through the window as a beacon, she searched around for her beloved Supreme hoodie. She grazed her fingertips across the floorboads and over the tabletops.

A few minutes in, though, Audrey began to hear a low rumbling. The first time caught her so off guard that she almost tripped. While she stumbled to regain balance, the rumbling only became louder. It turned into huffs and growls, as if there were a wild animal lurking deep in the apartment.  _ Tiffany better not have adopted an exotic pet,  _ Audrey thought. Unfortunately, the snarky joke didn’t calm her down at all. So, fearing the worst, she walked toward the source of the noise.

“Tiff? You in there?” she called out upon finding herself outside of Tiffany’s bedroom. No reply. The noise had gotten significantly louder and was most definitely coming from behind the door.  _ Maybe that’s just how she snores,  _ Audrey figured. However, something just didn’t sit right with her. Following her gut, she reached for the doorknob.

“I’m coming in, so you better not be doing weird shit,” she announced snippily. She then threw open the door almost anxiously. That was when she saw it.

A strange figure was hunched over Tiffany’s writing desk. Milky pink wings protruded from its back and horns popped out from its head. With each exasperated pant it breathed out, its whole body trembled. Steam leaked out from… its body? Its face? It was hard to tell from the angle Audrey was looking from.

“No way. Nuh-uh. I must be high,” she sputtered. She simply couldn’t believe her eyes. Monsters didn’t, no,  _ couldn’t  _ exist.

“Au… Audrey? Is that… you?” a strained voice called out. Suddenly, the figure craned its neck to face the door. It had a human face; the only difference being a few pink veins on its cheeks, fanged teeth, and the steam leaking out of its mouth.

It was Tiffany, Tiffany Maye, and she was sobbing.

“What the fuck?” Audrey asked in a high pitched whisper. Her eyes were wide and her jaw had practically dropped to the floor. Tiffany flinched at that and quickly shifted her wings to cover her face.

“I… I didn’t want you to see me like… this,” she hiccuped. Her voice was a bit hard to make out from behind her large wings, but Audrey could sense the hurt loud and clear. Only then did she realize that she wasn’t dreaming.

“Like what? What are you, anyway?” she asked softly. She did her best to hold back her sharp tongue for once.

“Th-that’s the thing. I don’t know. I’ve just been this way since I was little,” Tiffany replied shakily. She kept her wings up.

“What is ‘this’, though? Like, what happens to you?” Audrey pried. She was a bit irritated by the fact that her main question kept getting dodged.

“W-Well… You’re looking at it. I sprout wings and horns, my teeth become fangs and my nails become claws, sometimes I can breathe fire. Th-that’s why there’s so much steam,” Tiffany explained hesitantly. Her wings opened up an inch.

“So this happens when you’re pissed?” Audrey reiterated, trying to piece it together.  _ Sick, I wish I could burn whores with my breath,  _ she thought. She would’ve said it aloud, but decided against it. After all,  _ she  _ could very well get burnt herself.

“Something like that. Whenever my emotions go haywire, I become this,” Tiffany sighed, “Why do you think I try to be so cheery all the time?” Her wings lowered a bit more, enough to show her face. She pouted and glanced away guiltily.

“Thank god, so you are normal deep down,” Audrey blurted out. Somehow, she managed to completely miss the point. Perhaps it was because it was two in the morning, or perhaps it was because she was simply that kind of person. Either way, she’d rationalized her friend’s state rather quickly.

“You… you think I’m normal?” Tiffany muttered in disbelief.

“Uh, yeah. Everyone hides their true feelings deep down. It’s human,” Audrey scoffed, as if it should’ve been obvious.  _ I do it all the time, after all,  _ she added on in her head. However, she kept quiet about that and decided to roll her eyes for good measure.

“I’m human?” Tiffany repeated. Her voice was soft, though not quite weak. She sounded a bit calmer than before, at least. Fittingly, the steam slowly came to a stop and her wings folded up neatly.

“Did you bang your head on something during your supernatural hissy fit? Of course you are. We’re talking right now, aren’t we?”Audrey spat. Her irritated tone made it sound as though it was obvious; to her, it was.

“So… So you don’t find me strange or scary?” Tiffany asked, almost beaming. As a small grin crawled up on her face, Audrey began to make out just how many fangs her friend had. She gulped, taken aback by the sharpness, and blurted out,

“No, you’re weird as hell!”

Tiffany lips pouted instantly and Audrey could feel the terrible sensation called “guilt” fizzle up in her chest. She groaned in pain, pinched her nose bridge, and sighed,

“But I’d rather you be some Eldritch horror than an emotionless robot. Automatons are ten times freakier than demons.”

Tiffany burst into a bright smile that time. The fangs were still terrifying.

“Wow, Audrey, I didn’t think ‘Eldritch horror’ and ‘automaton’ were in your vocabulary! Have you been using my classic lit flashcards?” she giggled. The pink, popping veins on her cheeks began to simmer down. However, her face was soon obstructed by a pink t-shirt.

“Shut up, I take it back!” Audrey shouted, picking up yet another dirty t-shirt from off of the floor to throw. “You’re such a nerd, I bet that’s why you ended up like this in the first place!” Tiffany brought up a scaly hand up to her face and plucked off the shirt with two long claws. Surprising, she had on a melancholy expression.

“For such a dummy, you sure are intuitive.” She looked her friend dead in the eyes. “Studying late was a stupid idea, it only gets me frustrated.” Tiffany swiveled around in her chair and tapped at some papers on her desk. Her claw made a clicking sound as she tapped on a particular printed out medical paper.

“No way, you went off the shits because of a botched all-nighter?” Audrey scoffed. She threw the shirt after all, though Tiffany caught it that time.

“Yes, being a nurse is really important to me!” she whined. She threw the shirt back at Audrey with amplified force. It hit her torso with a loud  _ thwack  _ and she gasped like the wind had been knocked out of her.

“That hurt! Are you  _ trying  _ to kill me or something?” Audrey yelped as she clutched her stomach. Her breathing was heavy and ragged, yet Tiffany just laughed some more.

“Sorry, sorry, I know I need to work on controlling my strength!”

Audrey was running out of patience. She didn’t realize that dealing with a monster would be like training a puppy.  _ At least she’s self aware,  _ she thought as she rolled her eyes.

“I’m  _ gasping  _ for air and you  _ laugh _ at me?” she grunted after regaining a bit more of her breath. That time, she made sure not to look at her friend’s scary as fuck fangs.

“No, it’s not because of that!” Tiffany’s chuckles slowed, though not out of upset. “It’s just amusing that, even after my big reveal, we’re still talking to each other like always.”

For some reason, Audrey’s heart skipped a beat.

“D-Don’t get all sappy with me, moron,” she spat, crossing her arms. She turned her head away, half to act aloof and half to hide feelings she didn’t even recognize.

“Fine, I won’t,” Tiffany conceded cheerfully, “But can I at least ask why you decided to drop by in the middle of the night?” Inadvertently or not, her changing the topic took a weight off Audrey’s shoulders.

“I left my Supreme sweater here last night, so I came to get it,” she said matter-of-factly. She‘d almost forgotten about it during all of the commotion. However, at that moment, Tiffany’s laughter caught her attention. That time, it sounded awkward.

“About that… It looked really comfy so I put it on while studying, but… When I got frustrated, my wings popped out, and… It kinda ripped,” she admitted sheepishly. She hid her face with her wings yet again. That time, Audrey noticed the tiny pieces of white cloth hanging off the pointy edges. Her jaw dropped instantly.

“Tiffany, you bitch! You better buy me a new one, I swear to God!”

And that was the first time Audrey saw Tiffany’s Nymphojinn form.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is pretty much what I imagine to be the aftermath of the first Huniepop, but also Tiffany is a monster. Wahoo.

Even Audrey, who was the epitome of bitchiness, knew that dumping someone via text message was a dick move. It left both parties feeling awkward, one far more than the other, while also shutting down the possibility of retaliation. Can’t key a car through cyberspace, after all. It was curt, isolating, and overall the worst way to break up.

Besides getting dumped via forwarded email, since her boyfriend was also cheating on her with, like, ten other chicks. Fuck, who even used email anymore anyway?

And so Audrey found herself at the bar, nursing a drink from a glass that’d been refilled far too many times. Bright sunlight beamed in through the windows— it was only three o’clock— and nearly blinded her as she did some day drinking. Despite her high tolerance, she was already hammered.

“He was s'posed to be  _ my  _ bitch, not the o’er way ‘round!” Audrey slurred into the countertop. She slammed her free hand down, startling even the bartender. “What a… selfish asshole, am I right, Tiff?”

Audrey rolled around slightly to her right. Her cheek squished onto the cool, somewhat sticky wood. Maybe she’d spilled a bit of her daiquiri in her clamor. Whatever, that didn’t matter.

Only then did Audrey notice that the seat next to her was empty. For a moment, she wondered why someone on email’s CC list  _ wasn’t  _ drinking her life away. Then it hit her.

“Aw shit,” she groaned, realizing that Tiffany would  _ definitely  _ have a different reaction. Audrey slowly slid down the stool, trying to set her heels onto the ground. Her vision was out of focus but, damn it, she was determined.

“Put this on my uncle’s tab, awright? Belrose’s his name,” she managed to say. Audrey slapped the counter again for extra effect, knowing she wouldn’t sound convincing otherwise. The bartender awkwardly nodded and didn’t dare yell at her when she ran out the door.

“Wonder if… there’re Ubers all the way out ‘ere…” Audrey hiccuped, pulling out her phone. She quickly opened the Uber app and reserved the car closest to her. For once, she was regretting getting drunk. The concrete below her was spinning, spinning, spinning. The Uber pulled up just as she was about to keel over.

“Woah, lady, need help?” the driver asked with a pitiful look. Audrey sneered at him, so he backed off. She tugged at the door handle, pulled it open just enough, and toppled inside. The leather seats were so comfortable, she may have just fallen asleep had the driver not spoken up again.

“Where to? And put on your seatbelt, I don’t wanna get fired.”

Audrey groaned and grabbed onto the seatbelt. She used it to pull herself up, then buckled it on. She then leaned against the window and pressed her cheek to the cool glass.

“296 Mill Street,” she told him, “Y’know, that shitty buildin’ on the corner.” The driver said something to her, probably a confirmation, but he suddenly sounded like he was underwater. Audrey couldn’t hear too well past the pounding in her head. She shut her eyes tight, hoping to dispel it, and drifted into a light sleep.

“Lady, you better not have died back there,” the driver grumbled some fifteen minutes later, “We’re here!” Audrey flinched at the sudden yelling and hit the back of her head on the headrest. That was enough to rouse her, so she began to blink her eyes open fast and hard. She needed to be fully awake, needed every ounce of logic she had left, for this.

“Thanks,” Audrey said as she stepped out of the car. She fetched her keyring out of her skirt pocket and hurriedly opened the main door. She stumbled over to the elevator— thank god the building had one— and repeatedly pressed the up button. She knew it wouldn’t make it come any fast but, damn it, she was in a hurry.

The elevator finally ringed and opened its doors. Audrey dashed in and hit the third button so hard that the acrylic nail on her index finger snapped off. She whined, leaned against the wall, and slid down. The elevator doors closed and she was whisked upward.

“C’mon, c’mon!” Audrey yelled, banging her fist against the handrail. The elevator’s rumbles passed through her back as it slowly made its way. The third ring only came after what felt like ages.

“Fuckin’ finally!” Audrey exclaimed, though whether it was out of anger or joy was unclear. She leapt out of the elevator and made her way to Tiffany’s apartment. She didn’t bother to knock, she just jammed her key into the lock again. As soon as she opened the door, the strong scent of something burning wafted toward her.

“God damn it,” Audrey muttered under her breath. She ran into the kitchen, not caring to close the door back up, and grabbed the fire extinguisher. She wasn’t sure if she was sober enough to use it, but it was worth a shot. Cradling the extinguisher in her arms, she went down the hallway to Tiffany’s room. The door was open… and also scratched.

The first thing Audrey noticed was that the window curtain was on fire, which wasn’t ideal, but at least it hadn’t spread far. The second thing she noticed was that Tiffany, in all her monstrous glory, was standing right in front of it. The only way the fire could be put out was if she moved out of the way.

In that moment, Audrey changed her mind. She was  _ so  _ grateful to be drunk. If she wasn’t, her self preservation instinct would have kicked in to stop her from pulling the reckless move she was about to do.

“Here goes nothin’, dammit!” she cried, which caught Tiffany’s attention. She turned to look at her with her monstrous eyes. Audrey used that split second of vulnerability to charge at her. She elbowed her onto the bed with all of her might. Tiffany ferociously scratched back, though. Her claws dug deep into Audrey’s skin and tore downward.

“Calm the fuck down!” she yelled, gripping her arm in pain. Her blood dripped through her fingertips and onto the floor. Despite her injury, though, she tore the safety off of the extinguisher. Audrey aimed at the bottom of the fire and squeezed the trigger as hard as she could. White powder came spewing out with great force. It threw her off balance, so she ended up flinging a bit up at the ceiling before she dropped it on the floor with a loud clang.

“C’mon, lezz go,” Audrey grumbled, turning toward Tiffany. She seemed to have regained a bit of composure, albeit frozen in fear. Whether it was because of the extinguisher or because she’d hurt her, Audrey couldn’t tell. She sighed, took the blanket off of the bed, and wrapped Tiffany in it.

“Yer gonna need to… Hide that mess… When we leave…” Audrey panted, still in pain. She shook the case off of a pillow and tried to tie it around her wound. After a moment of fumbling, she gave up and instead attempted to get Tiffany off the bed.

“The fuck are you so heavy for?!” Audrey grunted as she pulled her friend’s arm. Thankfully, Tiffany finally became responsive again. She jumped off the bed and looked up at Audrey with wide, guilty eyes.

“I, what, huh, we’re leaving?” Tiffany asked frantically. Her eyes darted around the room, from the damaged window curtains to the blood on the wooden floor, then back at Audrey. She must’ve noticed that the blood was from her, as she picked up the pillow case and grabbed her by the arm.

“Duh… Yer rentin’ this place… Can’t have ya breakin’ shit…” Audrey scoffed as she was led to the bathroom. Tiffany had trouble entering the small room, what with her wings and all, but she managed. She sat Audrey down on the toilet lid and reached over to the cabinet. She brought a bottle of rubbing alcohol and some cotton balls over to Audrey.

“How… Did you know?” Tiffany asked as she dabbed a cotton ball with alcohol. She didn’t elaborate what, but Audrey knew. The cotton ball soon came into contact with the gash on her arm. She flinched at the stinging sensation.

“Guess you’re too pissed… To check the CC list…” she replied, chuckling a bit to ease the pain. That or maybe she was just too wasted to really feel it. It didn’t matter anymore.  _ I’m just grateful that she’s studying to be a nurse,  _ Audrey thought to herself. Suddenly, though, Tiffany flung her head up to look at her.

“You… You, too?” she asked in disbelief. Audrey wasn’t really a talker, so she simply tightened her lips in response. She really sympathized with the tearing shit apart approach. Upon getting no response, Tiffany awkwardly took the pillowcase and wrapped it around Audrey’s wound.

“Sorry… About everything… I forgot to restock on gauze…” she apologized meekly. It didn’t take back the fact that she’d hurt Audrey, but at least she was kind enough to not mention the whole cheating scandal aloud. Maybe it’d set her off again, who knows.

“S’okay, jus’ c’mon,” Audrey ordered, getting up and brushing off her skirt. She turned on her heel and walked out the room. She’d left the front door open, so she waited in the foyer.

“Hold on, Audrey, where are we going?” Tiffany asked frantically. As she ran, she readjusted the blanket to hide the supernatural parts of her body. At least she understood that they would be going outside.

“For a hike,” Audrey called without turning her head. Staggering just as badly as when she’d come, she left the apartment and headed for the elevator. Behind her, Tiffany locked up and then followed suit. When the elevator came, they entered and rode down it silently.

_ Ding! _

When Audrey stepped out, though, something odd happened. She felt claws wrap around her left hand. They gently scritched at her palm but, beneath it all, she could tell that it was still Tiffany’s warm hand. For the same claws that’d wounded her not too long ago, her grasp felt oddly comforting.

“Um, the hiking trail’s kinda far from here and you’re in no position to walk that far,” Tiffany spoke up. It was a little condescending, yeah, but that was to be expected from her. “I don’t know why you want to go there, but the least I can do is… Well, fly you there.” She blushed, ever so flustered, which showed how serious she was.

“D’ya  _ want _ people to find out?” Audrey spat. She didn’t turn to look at her, otherwise she’d be able to see her own blushing as well. She didn’t realize that she could’ve just chalked it up to being drunk.

“Oh please, bystanders will just think I’m the Mothman or something. You know, that thing Nikki likes,” Tiffany reassured, giggling a bit, “Besides, if anyone sees, I’m pretty sure I can… Well, nevermind.” Her voice turned cold and her expression hardened, but Audrey was too drunk to catch on.

“Oh yeah, that reminds me. You always deny the ezisence of subernachural stuff,” she instead pointed out. She grabbed Tiffany’s cheek and grazed a finger over the black vein that led down from her eye. “But yer living proof they ezist!”

“T-To make myself less obvious, duh!” Tiffany stammered. Her face was starting to blend in with her wings, what with her flushed cheeks. She pushed away Audrey’s hand, circled around her, and picked her up from behind.

“The hell’re you doing?!” Audrey yelped, “Tryna cop a feel or something?” She smirked and let out a snort at her own joke. Still, she sank into the embrace.

“Get your mind out of the gutter,” Tiffany chided, rolling her eyes. “You better prepare for liftoff!” She tugged Audrey into a nearby alleyway. Dull, slate walls narrowed in on them. The garbage disposal to the right and the fire escape above casted shadows along the claustrophobic corridor.

“Wait a sec,” Audrey groaned, finally processing the plan. “I’m still… kinda tipsy…” She attempted to wrestle away, but there were claws wrapped around her waist securely. When she tried to stomp the ground in drunken aggravation, she found there was no ground beneath her anymore. Only dizzying, dragging air.

“Oh, I don’t feel so good…”

Thank goodness for that garbage disposal.

“And now we both look unflattering,” Tiffany bemoaned as she gently floated her way up past the clouds. “I cannot  _ wait  _ for today to become a memory we can look back on and laugh at…” With each rhythmic flap of her wings, Audrey was lulled into an awkward and light slumber.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for being gone for so long! I try to do 1k a month for my chapter fics (as I have a few), but this shaped up to be much longer. I decided to break it the chapter into halves to avoid heavy delays. Also, I've now seen a friend beat Huniepop 2, so I can work on this fic without fear of plot holes or anything (reworked some stuff in my head). Hurrah!

**Author's Note:**

> Honest to God, I don’t even remember how I came up with the “two of the ladies in Huniepop 2 are the Nymphojinn in disguise” theory but it spiraled out of control and now here I am.


End file.
